Can Anti-Bullying Safeguards Go Too Far?

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

By Kathleen Benson, National Crime Prevention Council

Last week we spoke about implementing anti-bullying programs in our schools and addressed some challenges around making those programs a success. Sometimes implementing a bullying prevention program requires the support of the school board, Department of Education, and even the state legislation before it can achieve the desired results of the program. In 2010, New Jersey passed the Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights Act to update its bullying prevention legislation from 2002. Partially inspired by many high-profile youth suicides as a result of bullying, including that of Rutgers freshman Tyler Clementi, the Bill of Rights quickly gained notoriety as being the strictest anti-bullying law in the United States. Taking any measures to protect our students against bullying and aggression is a good thing, right? Some educators and administrators disagree, saying that the legislation has gone too far.

Cons to the Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights Act

The new legislation includes a lengthy list of additional requirements for schools. Educators and other school staff must report any instances of bullying known to them, on or off campus, if the incidences cause disruption with school operation; failure to comply will result in disciplinary action. Strict timelines were instated for reporting incidents to the principal, who then has a deadline to address and resolve the issue. Another challenge with reporting is determining if an altercation is bullying or a conflict. Inability to distinguish the two may result in additional reports that must be completed. Time used to focus on bullying identification, reporting, and resolution takes away from other issues with which students need assistance.

An initial concern with implementing the Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights in schools was the financial burden associated with it. Schools are required to attend trainings and create programs, but were not provided additional funding to support these efforts. In March 2012, Governor Christie remedied the problem by amending the legislation to include $1 million dollars for grant funding in the Bullying Prevention Fund. Grants will be distributed to local school districts that have exhausted all other free training options. How much additional work will be required for districts to examine and exhaust free training options? While the grants will help take the financial burdens off of school districts, will it be enough? Is $1 million dollars enough to spread across all the school districts in the state? Only time and experience can give us the answers we’re looking for.

Pros to the Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights Act

Implementation of any new program takes time, money, and adjustment to change. The Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights Act requires schools to take measures against bullying that prior to the law, may have just been a dream. Financial decisions on how to use money in a limited budget can leave desired programs and trainings by the wayside. Now trainings to keep all school educators and staff abreast of bullying prevention techniques are mandatory. Parental involvement in school activities has always been a challenge for schools, but now in compliance with the new law, schools must create and implement a safety team of parents and school staff to investigate reported incidences. Data isn’t available yet on the effects of the law, making it hard to determine if it will have a positive impact on school climate and bullying incidences. For now we can take comfort that New Jersey schools are combating bullying with full force.

In December 2011, the New Jersey Department of Education released a guidebook on the legislation, discussing the expectations and requirements of the law and how to implement it in your school. If you think that your school could benefit from having the Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights implemented, click here to learn how to start that process.
*****

For more information on bullying prevention and available resources to support your efforts, sign up today for the FREE professional development webinar for educators presented by the School Improvement Network, Bullying: Understanding the Problem, Defining Solutions on May 30th 2012, 3:00pm with Robin Young of the National Crime Prevention Council.

Click here to register for the FREE webinar: http://www.instantpresenter.com/AccountManager/RegEv.aspx?PIID=EA57D783884f

The Many Fronts of Bullying

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

By Mojdeh Henderson, assistant principal, Jay M. Robinson Middle School

I feel that bullying is an issue in our schools that impacts students in a variety in ways: from their ability to focus in the classroom, to their feelings about themselves, to the overall school climate. My concern is that bullying is not addressed in the home where students learn appropriate and inappropriate social interactions. Children many times do not believe that put downs, insults and gossip damage their peers and their relationships. They view it as just part of middle school and not a “big deal”.

However as a society we know that there can be minor and major impacts to bullying: from avoidance of school, self isolation to depression and even suicide. This issue is of major importance to all schools in America. As an administrator it is my responsibility to ensure that instances of bullying are addressed. As a district and a school we have a no-tolerance policy towards bullying and work to counsel bullies and bring their parents into the discussion. Many times bullies do not stop at the first consequence and more severe consequences need to be issued. We must continue to address issues of bullying. In many instances parents and students attempt to handle the issue on their own and then make the school aware when they are frustrated. Early intervention is the key so that bullying does not escalate.

As a society the issue of bullying must be addressed on multiple fronts: in the home, the classroom, the school and the district. Character education and empathy need to be taught so that students develop sensitivity towards others and understand how their actions and words impact their peers. This also needs to be modeled in the home and mandated by parents as the only option of behavior. If parents and schools can work together we can bring about a decrease in the amount of bullying within our schools.

*****

For more information on bullying prevention and available resources to support your efforts, sign up today for the FREE professional development webinar for educators presented by the School Improvement Network, Bullying: Understanding the Problem, Defining Solutions on May 30th 2012, 3:00pm with Robin Young of the National Crime Prevention Council.

Click here to register for the FREE webinar:http://www.instantpresenter.com/AccountManager/RegEv.aspx?PIID=EA57D783884f

Overcoming the Challenges Faced in Implementing Bullying Prevention Programs in Schools

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

By Robin Young, National Crime Prevention Council 

For more information on bullying prevention and available resources to support your efforts, sign up today for the FREE professional development webinar for educators presented by the School Improvement Network, Bullying: Understanding the Problem, Defining Solutions on May 30th 2012, 3:00pm with Robin Young of the National Crime Prevention Council.

Click here to register for the FREE webinar: http://www.instantpresenter.com/AccountManager/RegEv.aspx?PIID=EA57D783884f

Bullying has become a critical issue among schools everywhere. As educators attempt to get a handle on the growing concern, many attempt to implement bullying prevention programs on school grounds. However, the implementation of such programs is often met with a number of obstacles, including student participation, funding, and deciding what’s the right program for your school and students. Yet, as we move toward developing comprehensive bullying prevention practices, there are a few key strategies that we should all keep in mind.

Finding the right program

Creating a program that addresses your school’s unique concerns is of vital importance. The first step in doing so is to conduct a two-tiered assessment process that will guide the development of bullying prevention strategies. The first tier should involve surveys that reveal information about the school’s social climate, while the second should identify flaws in security equipment and procedures. Development of any action plan designed to address bullying should always begin with an assessment. We can’t solve the problem, until we define it.

Student participation

Student participation is critical to the successful implementation of any bullying prevention program. It is important that students feel empowered and engaged in the action planning process and that they share the responsibility for creating environments in which they can learn and thrive. Getting students involved and excited about taking part in a bullying prevention program will ensure that the program works to its full potential and that they can identify and address concerns that are most important to them.

Keeping it a priority

Maintaining a program’s importance after the excitement has settled is a major challenge that schools may face. Periodically updating a program with new ideas and incentives can help keep up the momentum and excitement for both students and educators. Whether a program is structured or unstructured, school leaders can find different ways to keep the program relevant. From creating a poster contest to structuring an assembly focused on bullying, be creative in your efforts to keep students motivated toward bullying prevention.

Creating an open environment

Overcoming the unspoken rule among students of “no snitching” may stop even the most successful bullying prevention program in its tracks. Bullying is a tough issue to face, so it is important to create an open environment where students can express their feelings and concerns in a confidential and comfortable environment. All teachers and administrators should be well educated on the topic of bullying and be prepared to assist students in successfully putting a stop to bullying. Giving students realistic tips and advice is an important step toward bullying prevention. When students feel that a strategy actually works, they are more likely to use that strategy again and again.

Cyberbullying in Schools, at Home, and in the Community

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

 By Trey Crews, former principal of Clarksburg High School, TN

As administrators know, sometimes more often than not issues we deal with start away from school but inevitably end up in our office, commonly Monday mornings.  A parent may bring a photocopied Facebook page of comments another student has posted about his/her child and expect us to deal with it.  We may tell the parent that because this incident occurred outside of school, we are not going to address it and they need to contact their local law enforcement. Generally if we don’t, usually a problem will occur from this that becomes school related, so it would be better to address it at the beginning at least monitoring the situation more closely even though it started off campus. You would be wise to apply the old saying “an ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure” as you consider how valuable is your time. 

Not only does bullying occur in the community with students, sometimes it also occurs with adults in the workplace.  So we know bullying is all around us and can take on many forms, and can be a very deceptive monster.

One way it can be deceptive is students’ misuse of technology. This is a main reason why most school districts hesitate to allow or put limited restrictions on personal communication devices and other advances of technology in schools.  Some peoples’ misconceived mindset when using technology is that we think we are alone but in reality we’re more exposed publicly and comments and actions are more concrete than ever.  As far as cyber-bullying or technology use goes, there needs to be a push for students to learn appropriate ethics when using this tool.

My philosophy as administrator on the topic of bullying is that we must be progressive. It may seem to some that this can be time consuming but in my experience to be reactive to situations concerning bullying can devour extreme amounts of time.  A step we took was to place an anonymous suggestion “bully box” in hall by the school counselor’s office, to let us be aware of situations that can be monitored.  Also a progressive step to aid prevention is having a strong school counseling program and the teachers and principal getting involved in students' school life through interactions by creating a healthy professional relationship with the students.  When dealing with a discipline problem or a bullying situation, sometimes we will just sweep it under the rug or let it go this time, because our patience has run out and we just don’t want to deal with it. Most often when it happens, it come back to bite us, those small issues are now out of control.  Teachers with the help of students are really the front lines on combating bullying. Our counselors are instructing students how to spot bullying and what to do. Administrators should allow training for teachers to be receptive to their students’ conversions and body languages.

I know our goal is to stop bullying and even in a “bully free zone” we should not think that we have annihilated bullying because when we do, there will always be transit students or even the exception to the rule, some situation that we have not thought of yet. So be sober and vigilant.

*****
For more information on bullying prevention and available resources to support your efforts, sign up today for the FREE professional development webinar for educators presented by the School Improvement Network, Bullying: Understanding the Problem, Defining Solutions on May 30th 2012, 3:00pm with Robin Young of the National Crime Prevention Council.

Click here to register for the FREE webinar: http://www.instantpresenter.com/AccountManager/RegEv.aspx?PIID=EA57D783884f

Effects of Bullying After 48 Years

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

By Martha McAdams, principal, Sebastian Charter Junior High

I was in the seventh grade and was sitting in Mr. Stamp’s social studies class. The teacher was outside in the hallway disciplining a student. A classmate, MM, told me he didn’t think I could make the same gesture he was making with my hand, I didn’t know what it meant and I showed him that indeed I could make that same gesture and a lot of his friends around us laughed. This type of baiting went on for several weeks. Finally, one of my classmates told me it was an obscene gesture and to never make it again. This was the beginning of MM’s harassment, but it was certainly not the end. All through junior high there were many days that MM would torment me.

It continued in high school but wasn’t as often when I became a senior and was elected an officer in several organizations. There were days that I didn’t want to go to school. There were days that I cried at school and many more days that I cried after I got home from school.

Some of the specifics have faded away with time, but the scene in Mr. Stamp’s classroom is still crystal clear in my mine. I can tell you where he sat and where I sat and where the clock was on the wall in social studies class.

You might think that this happened just a few years ago. No, this happened to me, 48 years ago. The hurt is less now. I am a successful person. I was lucky. I had friends and a family that loved me and supported me. I never told my parents or any teacher about the way I was treated. I didn’t know it was wrong for someone to get their jollies at my expense.

I became a teacher. I always looked out for the child that was a little different. I would not tolerate teasing or any form of bullying in my classroom. Now that I am a principal I do not tolerate any form of bullying at our school.

I have empathy for the students who have been picked on or make fun of at other places. This school is a no bullying zone. We teach students not only what to do if they are being bullied, but what to do if they see someone making fun of someone else. If you see it and don’t do anything about it, you are not being a responsible citizen. Everyone needs to be proactive, teachers, parents, administrators and students. Speak up so no one has to live with memories that last a lifetime that are anything but pleasant. I was lucky, mine were only minor emotional scars that eventually healed. I am lucky because I have a staff that is proactive about keeping bullying out of our school. Make every school a no bullying zone; teach all students what to do. Remember to treat everyone with respect so you can respect yourself.

****

For more information on bullying prevention and available resources to support your efforts, sign up today for the FREE professional development webinar for educators presented by the School Improvement Network, Bullying: Understanding the Problem, Defining Solutions on May 30th 2012, 3:00pm with Robin Young of the National Crime Prevention Council.

Click here to register for the FREE webinar: http://www.instantpresenter.com/AccountManager/RegEv.aspx?PIID=EA57D783884f

How "Bully-cide" Affects Us All

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

By Keith Besses, Principal at Van Zandt-Guinn Elementary School, Fort Worth ISD

When I hear the word bullying, I think about the episode of “Good Times,” an African-American series during the late 1970s where the youngest character, Michael Evans, comes home every day from school starving. The Evans later discovered that Michael is being bullied at school by an older boy. The mere innocent portrayal of bullying in this episode pales in comparison to the idea of bullying today. Bullying is defined as a form of repeated aggressive behavior manifested by the use of force or coercion to negatively affect others. The aggressive behavior can be in the form of physical, verbal and emotional abuse.

Bullying became an international awareness campaign during 2000 – 2010. According to the US Department of Education, 75% of children aged 8 – 11 years old have been bullied and this percentage increases to 86% for children aged 12-15 years old. Effects of bullying include loneliness, social isolation, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and an increased risk of suicide (known as bullycide). Since 2000, it is estimated that 15-25 children commit bullycide per year.

This statistic is not only alarming but paralyzing. The average classroom consists of 15- 25 children. This statistic overrides the cliché sticks and stones may break my bones but talking doesn’t hurt me. Stopping bullying encompasses the attitude that it takes a village to raise a child re-enforced by a strong positive environment of home, school and community.

The non-traditional home structure has deeply affected how some children progress and interact socially. The home is where children are first communicated family, spiritual and societal values. Parents and guardians must step up and take the role of parenting more seriously and make it the main priority in the home. Children are dying because of negative talk and behavior.

As stated earlier, since the majority of bullying incidents occur at school, the school has been thrust into the role of prevention when its primary role should be re-enforcement. Now, it is the understanding that the school being a diverse setting cannot re-enforce the value system of all households but the school should re-enforce values that emphasize consideration and compassion towards others. Repetition works effectively with children.

The third component of the strong positive environment is the community which includes extended family, neighbors, religious institutions, businesses, and mentors. Each component must take an active role in caring about the well-being of a child that they are in some form of contact with on a regular basis. All it takes is one person to take an interest in a child’s life to build self-esteem and increase their self-worth.

The affects of being bullied are also characterizations of the bully. Bill Cosby said it plainly, “hurt people hurt people.” When we decide as a society to create an environment where we practice the Golden Rule and treat others how we want to be treated, then we can significantly impact bullying cases and save one classroom per year at a time.

Creating a Schoolwide Anti-Bullying Initiative

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

By Jaime Stacy, Ed.D.

Assistant Principal, Salem Middle

As an administrator in a large school system (around 55,000 students), I was invited to be part of a taskforce to examine the bullying issue and lay the framework for a system-wide bullying initiative. While I wasn’t surprised to find that the schools within our division were doing different things to address bullying, the diversity and depths of the programs, methods, and interventions were surprising to me.

We decided as a team to start from the ground floor and construct a framework schools could then use to address bullying within their own building. Research on the subject showed that many of the best practices to combat bullying were closely related to the same techniques being used in schools implementing the Effective Schoolwide Discipline (ESD) model.

The ESD liaison for our school division was invited to become part of the taskforce and has helped to guide our thought process to exploring the following artifacts as we construct the framework:

• Surveys – Staff, parent, and student surveys related to bullying, school safety, and school climate

• Student discipline data – Focus on location, time of day, type(s) of bullying occurring

• Documents and materials pertaining to programs/initiatives already in place

While establishing this framework will aid in our endeavor to combat bullying in our schools, it is only one piece of the puzzle. Strong building-level leadership and stakeholder buy-in are key components to the effectiveness of any program, especially one that has the potential to create a drastic change in the culture of a school.

Anti-Bullying Pledge for Students

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

By  Kirk Dunckel, principal

Chief Kanim Middle School, Washington

At our school each Fall we have every student sign an Anti-Bullying Pledge Sheet. We take the time to meet with each class and review Respect and Responsibility expectations. We cover the different types of bullying and how deal with it as a victim and bystander. The Pledge Sheets work great when bullying occurs we pull the students Pledge Sheet and have a dialog with the student(s) about what they can do better to live up to their pledge. Our Bullying has dropped significantly. Another thing we have done is to create Anti-Bullying posters for our school with our students on the posters. Having our students faces on the posters has added a real sense of ownership to creating a Bully Free environment.

We believe that every student should enjoy school equally, and feel safe, secure and accepted regardless of color, race, gender, popularity, athletic ability, intelligence, religion, nationality, or any other qualities.

The situations will vary from student to student. We did have an issue with a group of boys teasing another boy at their lunch table. The student did everything right by trying to ignore the teasing and then reported to me. He shared names of the boys and I pulled their pledge sheets and we had a talk about what it means when you pledge something and then sign your name to it. They agreed they could do a better job and would do a better job living up to the pledge they signed. I had them re-date it and re-sign the pledge form. We have not had any issues with this group and the teasing of the boy since.

Chief Kanim Hawk Pledge

We, the students of Chief Kanim Middle School, agree to join together to stamp out bullying at our school.

We believe that everybody should enjoy our school equally, and feel safe, secure and accepted regardless of color, race, gender, popularity, athletic ability, intelligence, religion, nationality, or any other qualities.

Bullying can be pushing, shoving, hitting, as well as name calling, picking on, making fun of, intimidating, laughing at, or excluding someone. Bullying causes pain and stress to victims and is never justified or excusable as "kids being kids," "just teasing" or any other rationalization. The victim is never responsible for being a target of bullying.

By signing this pledge, I agree to:

1. Value student differences and treat others with respect.

2. Not become involved in bullying incidents or be a bully.

3. Be alert in places around the school where there is less adult supervision such as bathrooms and hallways.

4. Report honestly and immediately all incidents of bullying to a staff member.

5. Talk to school staff and parents about concerns and issues regarding bullying.

6. Work with other students and staff to help the school deal with bullying effectively.

7. Be a good role model for other students and support them if bullying occurs.

I understand that if I am demonstrating bullying behaviors and do not stop them immediately, I will be held accountable for my actions by the staff and students of Chief Kanim Middle School.

I also understand that if I witness bullying behaviors and do nothing to eliminate the problems, I am encouraging a bullying environment to continue at our school.

Signed by: __________________________ Date: __________

Print name: __________________________

Click here to download the Anti-Bullying Pledge.

Bullying or Growing?: Bullying Is Not Always What It Seems

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

By Scott Thomason, principal

As countless real-life stories can attest, bullying is an increasingly pervasive and destructive effect of our ever-expanding reality. Unfortunately, as with any mainstream issue, it is neither new nor as pervasive as most parents would have the media believe.

I do not doubt for one moment that it is not occurring regularly, not only my campus, but on campuses across America. After having fielded hundreds of calls from outraged parents over the past five years, however, I can attest that what a parent calls "bullying" is nothing more than the results of the natural development of kids.

I watch students at lunch every day, chasing each other, grabbing back packs, smack talking, and even, at times, tackling, hitting, kicking, and even throwing things at another student, but, is this truly bullying? In the vast majority of cases, the answer is NO! We have a litmus test here at my school that we use with parents and students to determine when an issue is or is not bullying: Is it unwanted? Is it ongoing? And most importantly, is it one-sided?

An issue we deal with regularly is when the parent of a “bullying victim” comes to us demanding justice because their child is being harassed, bullied, picked on, etc. And we have to tell them, “This is the first we’ve heard about it.” So, we also regularly educate our students on the importance of notifying someone when they perceive they are being singled out. But, due to the anti-snitch mentality, we almost always get blind-sided by out-of-the-blue allegations that, upon further investigation, fail one or more facets of the litmus test.

We are almost always confronted with the reality that little Johnny was playing around with a friend who either got mad or got carried away and did something harmful to hurt him. Of course, that doesn’t keep the parents from believing that we are doing nothing and that her child’s school is unsafe. I always have to tell the parent that unfortunately, you weren’t there, I wasn’t there, and the only ones who know the truth are telling different stories.

So, does bullying exist? Yes. Is it a problem? Yes. Does that mean that every parent’s fears are coming to pass and that the world is out to get their little baby? No. 99% of the time, it is about the choices a child makes, whether to talk or not talk, tell or not tell, play or not play, be a victim or stand up for themselves. Until the time comes when we stop falling victim to our own actions, we will ever be faced with bullies.

Bullying vs. Peer Conflict: An Administrator's View

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

By Curtis Nightingale, assistant principal

My contention . . . is that there is less actual “bullying” going on today than ever before. What we have now in most cases is a misapplication of the term. I know it is an overused concept, but bullying prevention is all about education. 

The topic of how to stop bullying in schools has become fodder for a media grasping at ways to rationalize a disturbing trend of violence on America’s youth, by America’s youth. Parents, perhaps remembering their own experiences with bullies, or in reaction to sensationalized national stories of intense criminal behavior committed under the name of “hazing” or labeled as “bullying” by the media, have begun to pressure legislators and policy makers to rush to action to in some way stem the wave of what has been labeled a bullying epidemic.

In reality, what we truly see in the schools is nothing new. Yes, there are some new wrinkles thanks in large part to texting and social media sites—which I will address later—but for the most part we see the exact same behaviors that were going on 10, 20, even 50 years ago. My contention, however, is there is less actual “bullying” going on today than ever before. What we have now in most cases is a misapplication of the term. I know it is an overused concept, but bullying prevention is all about education.

This misapplication of terminology, in my opinion, is confusion between what is actually bullying behavior and what is peer conflict. By definition, bullying is the persistent and ongoing harassment, assaulting, and/or intimidation of an individual or group of individuals by one or more persons. By contrast, many of the alleged bullying reports I receive are related to an incident over a girlfriend/boyfriend, verbal exchange, or what have you. The latter is actually a peer conflict. While peer conflicts can quickly become an ongoing situation, most do not. Helping students and parents to understand this difference is key to mounting an anti-bullying campaign in your building. Through this process of educating your student body and parents, they can begin to see the behaviors for what they are. And in this way, you can also communicate diffusing methods and ways to seek/provide help.

Far and away, I spend the majority of my time dealing with cyber-bullying, which is the use of telecommunication devices and/or the internet to harass. This phenomenon, which has been studied extensively, is not just relegated to youth. People everywhere feel a sense of empowerment by being able to make rude, crude, and even vile comments about one another via technology—saying things they would never say in person. Very similar to the comment I am sure you have heard, where someone elects not to carry on a conversation via email for fear their comments will be misconstrued.

The ramifications of these emotionally charged encounters between students will often spill over into the school setting. Still, depending upon the frequency and parties involved, these may still be just peer conflict issues. Now, through the use of social media and enlisting the help of others to harass and intimidate the targeted individuals involved, these scenarios can easily escalate into bullying. It is then through educating our students about what their actions constitute that we can become a critical piece of the anti-­‐bullying message. Often kids don’t realize their one comment, when added to the one comment of 10 - 20 others, becomes an overwhelming force for someone to deal with.

The bottom line is a clear and concise definition of bullying and educating your faculty, students, and parents as to what constitutes bullying can go a long way to creating a climate that is well‐informed and resistant to these behaviors.

Curtis Nightingale is the assistant principal for Pratt High School in Pratt, Kansas. Prior to the education field, Curtis retired from a career in law enforcement.

Who Should Take Responsibility for Bullying?

How to Stop Bullying in Schools

Call me crazy, but I don't believe the responsibility falls on the shoulders of teachers. So is it administration? Parents? Society? Media? No. In fact, it's perhaps the last place that we look.

A Dubai journalist recently covered the tragedy of an 11-year-old girl who was hospitalized by four boys who bullied and beat her. And at whom does the journalist point the finger?

The parents.

And my gut reaction is to agree. I grew up with parents who were not shy when it came time to discipline; therefore, I have always been inclined to look down on parents who, in my mind, were afraid to tell their child no. Now that I am a father of a child who truly is perfect (and at 3 months old, there's not much that he willfully do wrong besides spit up on my tie), I can understand now why parents can be, well, stupid about their kids.

But the journalist was ultimately wrong.

Because we've all either been the willful child or had the willful child (or both). Do parents contribute to and even encourage bullying, either directly or indirectly? Yes. There is actually very little in a child's life that we couldn't blame for bullying and misbehavior. Economics, neighborhood, movies, video games, peers, parents, and yes, even teachers. Each so-called "factor" has something valid to contribute to the mix. But all too often we forget that the first victim of bullying and the person responsible are often one and the same:

The child.

Who here is tired of hearing the words "they made me do it"? I understand that there are mitigating and contributing circumstances; but I am also one who says that if a child does not own up to his or her actions, then misbehavior will be a chronic episode in every aspect of that child's life. We can try to find all of the other symptoms in the world, but we must stop blaming everything else for a person's decision.

And therein lies the most important factor of bullying and perhaps even of life in general: we cannot make excuses for ourselves. After all the circumstances are listed--and there are many--and all the reasons examined--and they are certainly valid--do we finish by excusing every behavior and assigning responsibility to inanimate and unworthy factors like socioeconomics?

I submit that we would teach far more important things to our children by helping them take responsibility for their own actions than by using external factors as scapegoats (I am waiting for bullying to be classified as an illness). When children learn to take responsibility for their own actions, they will learn to be masters of themselves. And when teach children to take responsibility for their actions, we teach them that they can be anything they want to be--because they are choosing every day to be the person they are.

Perhaps there is no "cure" for bullying; but perhaps a strong antidote, if you will, is simply to believe (and then act on the belief) that children possess the potential to be far greater tomorrow than they are today. Isn't that why they are in school in the first place?

How a New Perspective Stopped Bullying in My Class

How to Stop Bullying

Bullies are simply people with difficulty handling their problems. But if you give them a chance to help someone else out of their problems, they will stand together with their peers until the very end.

By Deia Sanders, Master Teacher and Instructional Coach

As a teenager I fractured my spine doing what I loved, gymnastics. I went through a couple of surgeries and several procedures over the next 10 years. There were many times when I would feel angry or upset that this happened to me. It always seemed that about the time I would be feeling my lowest it would be time to visit the spine center, where I was usually the only person who walked in to the office. It never failed that being surrounded by people who were unable to walk made my problems seem small, and changed my attitude to grateful. In life, I’ve learned that there are two things that change my perspective very fast, and that’s seeing others suffer and helping those less fortunate.

It was no surprise that with this experience growing up, my first response to dealing with students who whined about school and bullied others was to change their perspectives. I tried to do this with telling them about the wonderful children in Kenya we worked with who walked many miles to school, and how no one made fun of each other because they were all trying to survive. I brought my husband in to talk to the kids about his experience in Haiti after the earthquake to spur their hearts and motives to change, but there was little lasting effect.

It wasn’t until we got our hands dirty that I saw my student’s attitudes begin to change. Like in most junior high’s, kids often make fun of special needs students. So we began learning about how disabled babies were thrown out like trash in some countries. We read and looked at pictures of this injustice, and began to talk about the wonderful life some people would be missing by not having a “special” child in their life. My students were spurred to action and began raising money to send to orphanages that housed special needs students. Their attitudes began to change towards those in our own classes.

Another reason many kids were bullied and made fun of was because of their economic circumstances. I could share with them about growing up with a single mom and the hardships we had, but it wasn’t until we began to raise money for small business loans in third-word-countries that their attitudes began to change. They wanted to give to the less fortunate rather than put them down.

In a school with 93% living below the poverty line it was astounding to see them cleaning out couches and cars, doing laundry, and picking up coins in parking lots to raise money for these needs. But the most impressive outcome was their perspective change. Many time bullies come to school carrying so much baggage and dysfunction from home that they can’t help but spread it everywhere they go. In the same way my attitude was changed as a teenager regarding my situation, their attitudes were changed regarding theirs. Many times we don’t give an outlet for the weight our campus bullies are carrying around, so it naturally spills on to everyone they come in contact with. If we could find more programs for them to shift their disappointments and struggles to, we could leverage their negative energy towards a positive outcome and show them that it’s not so bad, and not too much to overcome after all.

Detention or Court? Legislators Weigh In on Bullying

How to Stop Bullying

As educators, we walk a fine line that almost any other profession does not have to consider.

Trouble at home? “Not our problem,” the corporation gets to say. Coworker disagreements? “Deal with it,” middle-management can respond.

But trouble between two students? An unsteady home environment—including missed meals? Both are contributing factors to bullying, and we can’t ignore it. We educators get to take it all on, and oh, by the way, make sure your students also pass their standardized tests.

As we examine how to stop bullies, the conversation necessarily calls into question our end goal. What are we reaching for, exactly? We write lesson plans, we prepare staff development sessions, and we perform a host of other tasks, but what are we hoping to achieve? We need to keep our focus on what we are doing for these children.

I, for one, consider our responsibility to be toward the whole student, not just a student’s intellect.

States are now starting to take the whole child approach to education, even going so far as to legislate student rights. A recent article by New Jersey columnist Stephen Leff discusses a recent measure by the state of New Jersey to put an end to the very serious issue of bullying. Leff herein describes a type of bullying that does not use verbal or physical abuse at all; instead, “relational aggression” targets a person’s reputation. Says Leff,

So it’s a welcome development that New Jersey first passed, and recently reaffirmed, its Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights Act. After the law was considered an unfunded mandate that was scheduled to expire, the Legislature and Gov. Chris Christie joined together to provide the funding needed to help school districts implement the law.

Anti-bullying efforts have taken the form of legislation in countries throughout the world. But not all lawmakers are convinced that making anti-bullying laws are going to amend the situation. The debate continues in Canada according to this article:

No amount of legislation from the federal government could prevent or end cyberbullying, a Senate committee was told Monday.

"Cyberbullying is a complex phenomenon and there is no evidence that the introduction of specific laws will prevent it," said Shaheen Shariff, an expert on cyberbullying from McGill University in Montreal. "Big stick sanctions . . . may not work."

She said existing laws under the Charter of Rights and Freedoms, provincial human-rights codes and criminal laws can be reinterpreted to be placed into a digital context.

The growing problem with cyberbullying has much to do with the fact that young people don't know what they should and should not be posting online, she said. Shariff said young people often found guilty of cyberbullying say they only posted outrageous comments or content online to make others laugh and not to harm anyone.

What do you think students need? Should lawmakers create legislation surrounding this issue? How do you stop bullying in your schools and classrooms? How do you help bullies stop?

PS. It is now easier to leave comments on our blog! So try out the new functionality by responding to a few of these questions.

Administrators Win an iPad 3

How to Stop Bullies

As we discuss how to stop bullying on this blog, the video blog, and in a webinar by the National Crime Prevention Council (info coming soon!), educators on this blog have asked to hear more from administrators.

Your time is precious, and so are your students. So as a way to help make your time worth a few minutes to type out a blog post, we want to give one guest blogger administrator this month an iPad 3, totally free.

But let’s not lose our focus—this blog is dedicated to provide all educators with effective ways to create a learning atmosphere. The iPad 3 is nice (very, very nice); however, it’s not why we do what we do.

In the month of April we had more blog post submissions than we were able to publish, and the feedback that we received was phenomenal.  This month, May is dedicated to understanding the complexities of bullying, helping bullies stop, and helping victims protect themselves. In other words, it’s another essential part of creating a learning environment. Administrators deal with bullies several times a day—and we’d like to hear what strategies you use to create a safer school.

So, to all you administrators, superintendents, and principals (or to all your secretaries), we invite you to win the iPad 3 at the end of the month by sending us some of your most successful strategies (and yes, more posts will increase your chances).

29 days. 1 iPad 3. Unlimited potential.

I can’t wait to hear from you. Send your submissions to jared.heath@schoolimprovement.com.

5 Steps of Cyber-Bulling: How Proxy Bullying Works, Part 2

 How to Stop Bullies

The internet makes bullying by proxy far more available, manipulative, and hurtful. Cyber-bullying by proxy can take place anywhere at any time—even without the victim’s immediate knowledge.

Of course, cyber-bullying requires an online social network—it is how a student comes in contact with a bully in the first place. The network can be as simple as the school’s intranet, or it can be a student’s Facebook account.

Here are 5 steps that cyber-bullies follow to use others as their proxy.

Step 1. Flag a peer’s account online

Cyber-bullies will start flagging another student’s online account as inappropriate, though the student has done nothing wrong. When internet provider (IP) servers receive enough flags on a particular IP address (computer), then the account gets blocked or shut down.

However, service providers are aware of this kind of abuse, and they usually verify the flags as a counter-measure. In response to that measure, a bully will often provoke the target into retaliating or saying something mean or defensive so that the flag shows up as legitimate.

Step 2. Tag an inappropriate image

Whether on their own account, a dummy account, or even on their victim’s account, a bully may post an inappropriate, insulting, or defamatory picture and tag their victim. The victim’s peers see the image and it spreads, or the peers may think the victim posted the image, causing backlash from friends.

Step 3. Hijack a student’s account to send inappropriate messages

If a bully is able to access account information, he/she may send rude, hateful, and inappropriate messages to the victim’s list of friends. Not only can the account then be flagged for inappropriate activity and get shut down, but the social ramifications are far reaching.

Step 4. Create a defamatory web page or group

A web page can create traffic, discussion, and inappropriate content related to a student. This is akin to gossiping in that the victim is unaware of the activity, but it goes far beyond merely talking about another person when pictures and even videos can be posted.

Step 5. Advertise their victim in chat rooms

One of the most harmful forms of bullying is the use of a chat room. Bullies have been known to enter explicit chat rooms and there advertise their victim’s online profiles, email, and sometimes even home phone numbers.

The internet provides a forum wherein the worst forms of bullying can be encountered. Now our students are bullying each other outside of the halls of school. What are your methods for preventing cyber-bullying? What role do we educators play in stopping these activities?